"A Wedding Feast"

Matthew 22:1-14

A sermon preached by the Rev. Douglas M. Donley

October 9, 2005

University Baptist Church

Minneapolis, MN

About a dozen years ago, I performed the first of many weddings for same-sex couples. Dave and Jeff were members of my church in San Francisco. They are fun-loving people who have a very deep faith. They wrote their vows, they wrote their service. They wanted to kneel after saying their vows and they wanted me to say a prayer over them as they joined their lives together. They were also very clear that they wanted to call this a marriage. This was true in the eyes of their conception of God and their conception of church. Jeff’s mother supported them, but not by Dave’s parents. They were surrounded by their friends and their church family—their family of choice. The City of San Francisco solemnized their marriage during the "Winter of Love" in February of 2004 when so many others had their marriages "legalized" of only for a short time. They are the loving doting dads of two-year-old Jacob.

In honor of them and in honor of all those others who dared to come out of the closet, I decided many months ago to preach on marriage on this Coming Out Day service. Since we were looking at the texts from Matthew’s Gospel throughout the fall, I chose this story of a wedding feast from Matthew 22. It’s even the lectionary reading. About a week ago, I had that awful experience of "What was I thinking?"

"The Kingdom of Heaven might be compared to this," said Matthew. I read and reread this scripture many times, trying to find the right interpretation. It sounds like a brutal and horrible wedding with a nasty father of the groom. I’m not sure I would want to be invited to such a wedding. The one throwing the wedding, "the King" seems like he has some issues to work through. Look at what happens when the invitations go out.

First, the people don’t want to come. Then the people laugh at the king. Some even kill his slaves. Then the king comes back and kills all of the people who killed the slaves. He then invites anyone else to come from the town. When someone came to the wedding without the right clothes, the king throws this one out. The king leaves us with the message that many are invited, but few are chosen.

This has led to a lot of kooky interpretations. John Calvin looked at this parable to support his doctrine of divine election, which says that some were chosen for salvation by God, and we don’t know who is in and who is out.

Our Seminary Intern Anne Supplee and I were talking about this parable on Monday and she said, "it sounds like the smartest people are the ones who don’t show up at all."

Many in the GLBT communities are not fully invited to the great feasts. They are invited if only they don’t mess things up by being public about their lives or their loves. They are invited as long as they stay in the closet and stay secretive about their lives. They are invited as long as they wear the right clothes. But God help the one who dares speak the truth, or dares come in drag, or dares to push the bounds of acceptability. Of course the king will throw you out. You get what you deserve.

This is the popular interpretation of this parable and it just makes my blood curdle. So, the preacher has a choice when left with a problematic parable. The first is to change the scripture reading. Can’t we look at the wedding at Cana in the second chapter of John’s gospel where Jesus turns water into wine? That’s a more positive viewpoint isn’t it? Or how about Luke’s version of this same a parable? It’s not a king at all, it’s simply a man and when people make excuses, they don’t kill the messengers and the man doesn’t kill the others. The man goes to the highways and byways and invites the poor and the hungry and invites them to the feast. No one is excluded because of his or her clothing. Everyone is happy ever after and there is a nice message too, about the first being last. Isn’t that a better wedding story?

But both of those ways would be rather cowardly. We tend to skip over those parts of scripture we don’t agree with. It’s so much easier. It doesn’t mess with our world view. It doesn’t mess with our perception of God. And yet, this is part of the cannon of scripture. We know other people view this scripture more importantly than we do. Maybe we ought to deal with it.

So here goes. Bear with me.

What really bothered me about this scripture is that it seems to go directly against the teachings of Jesus in the Sermon on the Mount. How could a benevolent God be so arbitrary, violent and picky about our clothes? How could a God like this be worthy of worship? How do we know when we’re wearing the right clothes? How do we know when to not upset this God for fear of our eternal damnation?

Traditionally, this parable has been seen as a repudiation of Judaism. The Jewish people were invited to metaphorical wedding feat of God. Some scoffed at the invitation—they ignored Jesus. Still others killed the ones sent by God. And God punished them, possibly by destroying the temple in Jerusalem. And finally, the Gentiles, the nations were invited to the feast from the main streets of the towns, but they had better watch their presumption. For God is not easily mocked and might well punish those who step out of line.

This line of thinking has supported anti-Semitic actions and thoughts. This line of thinking has fueled the flames of punishment if the proper pious vestments are not worn at all times. We need to please God with our pomp and our circumstance. This line of thinking has kept people out of the church if they didn’t follow the right path. They were thrown into the sea where weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth are the norm. And many have chosen the would-be smarter path of not showing up at all.

But this can’t be all there is to the story.

Thank God for the on-line writings of radical Jesuit Catholic priest Daniel Berrigan. He saved my faith in the Gospel writer. He said that the key to looking at this scripture is the fact that the Jesus says that the Kingdom of Heaven may be compared to the following wedding feast. It may be compared, or contrasted to such a feast. A key here is to look at the host of the party. The person throwing the party is a king. We all know how kings operate. This king sounds like many kings throughout the world.

The king is full of presumption. The king demands his way. The king has slaves. The king is feared. The king has an army. The king has great wealth, in fact the greatest wealth in all of the land. Only the most foolish would dare mess with a king. The most foolish, or the most clever.

The king throws a feast for his son and demands people to come and attend. But people see through this king. No one attends the wedding, even those invited. This is treason. This is disobedience. This is juicy and delicious to those who think the King is really an emperor with no clothes.

The king doesn’t know what to do with this. He is dumbfounded. He then sends the second wave of slaves. This wave gets the same treatment, but some of the revelers get out of hand. The slaves get killed—like pawns in a chess game. This gives the king the permission to use the ultimate weapon at his disposal, righteous retaliatory violence.

He not only kills those who killed the slaves, he goes way overboard. He kills the whole town and burns their village. And still he is being laughed at. Who has the real power now?

Finally, he compels the people to come from the main streets. These are people who are not originally invited to the feast. These people are not the elite. But the king is desperate to have someone like him. He makes alliances with those who used to be his enemies. Or at least with those whom he used to ignore. These people come to his feast, but the king doesn’t know how to deal with their culture. He doesn’t know how to have fun with people so different than he. He doesn’t understand their jokes. He doesn’t know how to be a very good host. He is not sure he trusts these people. He can’t relax, because his friends have abandoned him and there are more of his new guests than there are guards.

The guests don’t seem to thrilled to be there either. Some might have come dressed a bit differently. That’s when the king pulled someone aside, found a scapegoat and told him he was wearing the wrong clothing. He kills this person and sends him away. The king couldn’t celebrate his own son’s wedding without punishing someone.

Everything that Jesus had said up to this point seems to say that the ways of God are not the ways of the world. Is this the Kingdom of Heaven? Is this what God is like? Can God be positively compared with this king?

Of course not.

The God that Jesus describes throughout the Gospel is the exact opposite of this king. This king is ruthless, whereas God is kind. This king is vengeful, while God is merciful. This king embraces violence while God says thou shalt not kill. Jesus tells the people of a God who is the exact opposite of worldly kings.

Jesus said "you have heard it said, ‘an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth’, but I say to you Do not resist the evildoer with violence."

Jesus said "you have heard it said ‘love your friend sand hate your enemies’, but I say to you love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you."

Jesus said ‘you have heard it said, ‘don’t murder’, but I say to you don’t even get angry."

Jesus said that all are welcome at his table. All are part of his wedding feast. "All who do the will of God are my brothers, and my sisters and my mother and my father."

Jesus welcomed the lepers and the outcasts, every person whom organized religion had called unworthy. Jesus said that God has called you worthy. And if a king tells you that you have the wrong clothes on, then consider the source. For none are unworthy at my feast.

Jesus said the kingdom of God might be compared with this king’s banquet, but those who follow Jesus will find that the king is not at all like God. And Anne would be right to say that the smartest people would not attend that kind of wedding feast.

So, welcome to the wedding feast of Jesus. That’s what the true church of Jesus Christ is all about. This is a feast for the Spirit where all are welcome. This is a feast where there are no boundaries. This is a feast where the last shall be first and the first shall be last. This is a feast where the poor are lifted up and the rich are sent empty away. This is a feast where the former nobodies are God’s somebodies. This is a feast where no one can call you an outcast and get away with it. This is a feast where we celebrate love in all of its forms. This is a feast where we mourn for the world that is blinded by its own greed, its own lust for power, its own temptation to put God and God’s people into a small box. This is a feast that witnesses to something new and glorious, and blessed by God.

This is the wedding feast that Jesus calls us to. So celebrate the wedding that Jesus calls us to. Celebrate the wedding that blesses all people. Celebrate the wedding that supports love. Celebrate the wedding that says that two people can and will be healthier because they have each other. Celebrate the wedding that knows who God is and who the emperor is. Celebrate the wedding that never confuses the two. Celebrate the subversive wedding of Jesus Christ that does not tolerate intolerance; that celebrates the healing power of love in all its forms. Celebrate the wedding of love, justice, mercy, compassion and the guts that so many people have when they come out of the closet enough to share their love with someone and ask a community to share in the celebration.

For to such shall be compared the Kingdom of Heaven. It’s what the reign of God is all about.

In this church, we celebrate love. We celebrate freedom. We celebrate reclaiming the healing power of God. We resist the temptation of putting God back in that closet of retribution and arbitrariness. The God of love has come out of the closet in the message of Jesus/. That’s the wedding feast to which we are all invited, without exception or litmus test. May God’s extravagant welcome guide, sustain and empower us all. Amen.